Ladies: Why We Need Our Girlfriends

I’ve always been a “guy’s girl”. I enjoy watching Sunday football at a sports bar on a crisp Autumn day. I hate gossip and drama. I can laugh at myself and take a good deal of heckling (most of the time… I have my moments). As a result, my group of friends has usually consisted of far more guys than girls. Sure, I’ve had my share of token girlfriends for those critical Saturday nights when I need to know if that skirt goes with those shoes (the boys just don’t have a clue when it comes to that stuff – trust me).

But recently having a great group of girlfriends has become much more important to me than in years past. I’m not sure why…. Maybe I’m just getting older (boys come and go - blah, blah, blah). Maybe I’ve overdosed on men after living in Park City for the last year, where the ratio is 10 guys to every girl. Maybe I just miss having someone around who is as excited about getting a pedicure as I am. I don’t know. But after realizing how rare and precious having really great girlfriends actually is, here’s what I’ve learned to appreciate the most:

1) A great girlfriend is there for you. A really great girlfriend won’t hesitate to bring you magazines, movies and chicken soup when you’re sick. She’ll be the first one knocking at your door with chocolate chip cookie dough and tissues when your boyfriend dumps you. And you’ll always be able to count on her to tell you how kick-ass you look in your new jeans. There’s something special about women where we just naturally feel the need to BE there for each other. You can’t put a price on that kind of loyalty.

2) A great girlfriend can relate to your problems. Whether you’re dealing with the glass ceiling at the office or having to break things off with a needy guy, a girlfriend is going to “get” where you’re coming from. She understands what you’re going through, not because you’re describing it so well, but because she’s been there herself. She knows the nuances of the experiences you’re dealing with. There’s an unspoken understanding among women that you can’t find just anywhere.

3) A great girlfriend understands the value of depth. I love having a beer with my guy friends, but I connect with my girlfriends though our meaningful conversations about life. We talk about our feelings and process our emotions (a man’s greatest fear!). We connect through analyzing our inner selves. We gain wisdom about love, careers, friendships, and spirituality. Talking to my girlfriends gives me an opportunity to reflect on where I am in life and whether I’m on the right track.

4) A great girlfriend actively supports your dreams. A really great girlfriend is your biggest cheerleader. She’ll encourage you to pursue your life goals (Grad school? Travel around the world? Joining the Peace Corp?) She’ll be there for you when you feel like giving up. She’ll help you find the motivation you need to persevere through difficult challenges. She’ll listen as you re-evaluate your life goals. She’ll even hold your hand when you give up on certain dreams (marrying the wrong guy, going to law school because your parents wanted you to). A great girlfriend doesn’t just blindly support you – she is actively engaged and invested in your happiness, and does everything she can to make sure you are following your true path.

I could probably come up with a lot of other reasons why having girlfriends is so important to me these days. But here’s the bottom line: my girlfriends offer genuine acceptance in my life. They never expect me to be anyone other than who I already am. However, they cheer me on as I pursue my personal growth and create an authentic life from one day to the next. And at the end of the day, that’s what it’s all about.